Soul Doubt: Exorcising the NicoDemon

Monday, October 1, 2007

Exorcising the NicoDemon

Today's the day. The BIG day. The first day in I-don't-know-how-long that I voluntarily will absolutely not smoke one nasty cigarette all day.
Yep, I'm quitting. No more butt-sucking for me. (Sounds pretty disgusting when you put it that way, huh?) Well, it is disgusting, and I'm sick of it. No more yellowing fingers, no more mouth tasting like an ashtray, no more spending over a thousand dollars a year on a slow form of suicide. Nope, I've decided I would like to see my son grow up, and for him to not have to see me puffing away while we're at it.
I think I have a slight edge on the average quitter, as I only sucked down 9 or 10 cancer sticks a day. There's no smoking in our house, either, so I'd already eliminated the "comfort of my own home" element. The smoking while driving thing will be pretty easy, too- although I used to love to smoke while I drove, since I've had my son he's usually in the car with me, so that's out.
So the toughies are going to be after meals (or sex, for that matter), while in stressful situations, or while around other smokers. But I think I'll be able to combat the urge by reminding myself why I'm doing it, and use the little tricks recommended by others who've succeeded. You know, hard candies, staying busy, that kind of thing.
What really ticks me off is the fact that I'd quit (although not of my own volition) for a little over a month, but caved at the first whiff of secondhand smoke, and have been at it ever since- for about six weeks now. And I've hated it! It hasn't tasted good, nor has it satisfied my neurotic oral-fixation tendencies, for quite awhile now. All the more reason to kick the habit.
I can do this. God's already helped me get rid of a lot of nasty habits in my life... I'm sure He won't mind me bugging Him for help with one more.

1 comment:

  1. I quit and haven't smoked for over a year. I tried the Commit lozenges and they worked really well. For the first few weeks, I used a lozenge anytime the urge to smoke hit me. I allowed myself as many lozenges as I wanted. After a few weeks, I started to cut back on lozenges. Slowly, I was able to cut back from lozenges until I no longer used them at all.

    It was hard to apply the 12 Steps to smoking because my life was manageable while smoking. But I did use other techniques. When I felt the urge, I would wait another 15 minutes to see if the urge passed. I would call my sponsor. I did have to change meetings that I attended because some meetings I found I would smoke more before and after the meeting than other meetings.

    It was harder for me in many ways to quit smoking over quitting presecription pain killers. I think because smoking wasn't as taboo as the pills and my family could tolerate my smoking. That was why it was so important for me to find ways to be active when I found I was coming down with a bad case of the F-Its. Lozenges helped.


Thanks for taking the time to read what I ramble about- I consider it an honor to get feedback from you guys, so please tell me what you think, feel, if you have a similar story... whatever you'd like! Thanks again and God bless.